This was cute - a friend sent it to me - take it will a grain of salt.

Twas the night before elections

And all through the town

Tempers were flaring

Emotions all up and down!

I, in my bathrobe

With a cat in my lap

Had cut off the TV

Tired of political crap.

When all of a sudden

There arose such a noise

I peered out of my window

Saw Obama and his boys

They had come for my wallet

They wanted my pay

To give to the others

Who had not worked a day!

He snatched up my money

And quick as a wink

Jumped back on his bandwagon

As I gagged from the stink

He then rallied his henchmen

Who were pulling his cart

I could tell they were out

To tear my country apart!

'On Fannie, on Freddie,

On Biden and Ayers!

On Acorn, On Pelosi'

He screamed at the pairs!

They took off for his cause

And as he flew out of sight

I heard him laugh at the nation

Who wouldn't stand up and fight!

So I leave you to think

On this one final note-

IF YOU DONT WANT SOCIALISM

GET OUT AND VOTE!

Two of my favorite joke topics - blondes and cats

Look closely - Blondes will not get this one!

Next Great Fridge Magnet!

We the People

I know my wife will love this one!

Nobel Peace Prize

Me Be Gone Video

Ed Stetzer shared this on his blog from the drama team of Two Rivers Church! Enjoy

ME BE GONE from Two Rivers on Vimeo.

New Motivational Poster

Sent to me by my Tall Son, Michael!

Some great videos you have to check out!

http://www.timhawkins.net/video.php

Margaret make sure Hannah sees the Chick Fil-A song!

Katie and Michael - watch this one!

Matt & Belinda - watch this one!

Another Thing Girls have Over Guys

GERMS!

According to an article in NEW SCIENTIST entitled, "Ladies, your hands are a zoo," you ladies are dangerous! We knew that anyway but now we have proof!

A study showed that even though they wash their hands more frequently, (I guess that is true), women have more kinds of bacteria on their hands than men do. The study showed that five kinds of bacteria were present on all people, but even on a single person (don't know about a married person - maybe they meant something else ...) the bacteria on a dominant hand was differend than on a non-dominant hand. The researchers from the Univ. of Colorado were surprised by the differences between men and women and speculate that factors like "sweat, sebum production (don't know what that is but is sounds bad) hormones (we buy them in our house), and even the use of cosmetics (you mean we buy germs ...)" could contribute to the difference.

This reminds me of a story I tell about my Grandmother Margaret, who died at 101 and was so special to me. She was a long time Presbyterian but when she moved to Richmond she considered herself a missionary to the Methodist. Was a member of Centenary UMC in downtown Richmond for probably over 60 years. Well one day she told me that the new preacher was changing things that she did not like. He wore a robe that was like the pope's. Not a preaching robe like most protestants but kinda weird in her mind. But what really bothered her about his changes was the way he changed the way you take communion. Methodist always come up for the Lord's Supper and mostly use the prayer bench and partake. The new preacher, a Dr. Somebody, wanted to place the bread wafer into the mouths of the congregants. Grandma Margaret's not so silent protest was, "I am not going to do that, I was married to a man, and raised a man and I know that you never know where a man's hands have been!"

I guess if she was still alive she would find this research somewhat suspect! But it would be great to hear her tell that story again!

Not very Funny

Weighing yourself

To all my friends that are trying to lose weight - and not doing it! Here is the RIGHT way to weigh yourself and feel better about it! Be sure you have taken your blood pressure medicine before you get down on the floor!